In our modern day western societies, we are conditioned to believe that constant exhaustion, overwhelm, and the feelings of being constantly run down is just a part of normal Mum life, however these can be symptoms of Dr Oscar Serrallach’ term - postnatal depletion.
Postnatal depletion is what happens when we are not able to recover physically, hormonally, nutritionally or emotionally after having a baby.
For some, this can start during pregnancy as our key nutrients are being given to our growing baby in our belly and can last for years and some times decades after giving birth if we do not look after ourselves.
Postnatal depletion is not just about nutrient and hormonal deficiencies, but can be a result of our own experiences of personal experience as we navigate stages of modern day motherhood. It is not only caused from pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding but by the stresses and strains of modern day parenting.
The signs of postnatal depletion can be varied but may include:
Intense fatigue and exhaustion
Lethargy
Hypervigilance
Mood swings
Low libido
Poor memory or “baby brain”
Feelings of guilt or shame
Poor immune system
Women who experience postnatal depletion may feel a sense of being lost, or have feelings of loss of self. They may also feel guilty and ashamed they’re not enjoying motherhood the way they are seemingly “meant” to.
Postnatal depletion should not be confused with postpartum depression. Postpartum depression is a serious mental illness that causes intense feelings of anxiety, sadness and despair. If you are unsure, do not hesitate to seek professional medical advice.
According to Serrallach, depletion primary factors include:
Nutrients passed onto baby whilst pregnant and giving birth and after if the mother is breastfeeding.
Major sleep deprivation
Drastic changes of a new mothers role and social isolation
During pregnancy, women are often supported with care from prenatal appointments, classes, courses and more as they prepare for the birth of their baby, however once the baby has been born - the focus shifts to the baby and their needs. In a way, a new mothers needs are forgotten as she navigates the vulnerable postpartum period.
“The mother disappears into the shadows of her role,” Serrallach mentions.
The thing is, mothers need support; they need love, compassion. It is a full time gig isnt it, which is why I often say we need to hold the mother as she holds her children so that she can be the best she can be.
According to Serrallach, there are ways that a mother can support herself with postnatal depletion which include:
Replenishing key nutrients
Postnatal depletion is not only cause from pregnancy where the mothers nutrients is passed onto her growing child and during birth, but also during the postpartum period where the mother needs nourishment for healing, breastfeeding, stress and sleep deprivation.
A way to replenish nutrients is by eating balanced, regular meals incorporating protein, carbs and good fats. A focus on some of these nutrients in your postpartum may be helpful:
Iron
Protein
Omega 3 fatty acids
Vitamin C
Vitamin A
Choline
Zinc
In Ayurvedic practises, there is a focus on eating foods that are warm, soft and well cooked, being that it is easily digested providing the nutrients the mother needs for nourishment.
Ask for support, accept the help and prioritise rest
In traditional cultures, it is common for mothers to have a dedicate time period where they are encouraged to rest, heal and bond with their baby. This period acknowledges the physical and emotional journey that the woman has gone through prioritising rest and support from others in their community and villages.
In our modern day Western societies, this is definitely not a focus however to assist with postnatal depletion we should be prioritising rest and healing, giving ourselves grace, taking the pressure off of “bouncing back,” and allowing ourselves to ask and accept help.
A few ways we can do this is:
Not using our phones in bed and avoiding blue light an hour before bedtime
Outsourcing housekeeping and cleaning
Organising a meal train
Asking family members to look after older children
Organising grocery deliveries and / or other food services
Asking family members or friends to look after the baby whilst you have a sleep
Consider doing postpartum planning
Fill your freezer in your pregnancy
Consider hiring a postpartum doula
Another way to allow yourself time to heal and assist with postnatal depletion is by hiring a postpartum doula. A postpartum doula is there for the mother, she holds the mother whilst she holds her baby. Not only supporting, nourishing and nurturing the mother in their journey, but provides a non judgemental listening ear.
They are there for the mother, to help with her needs whatever they may be whether it be physical support like assisting with general housekeeping, to providing nourishing meals, prioritising rest to emotional support and more.
It is so important to give yourself time and allow yourself to heal, because when you feel good, you thrive, you are able to be the best for your baby.
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